Suicide and the Elderly

Did you know that the highest risk for suicide is among elder adults, especially white males over the age of 65? Shocking, isn't it? Living alone, whether the result of divorce or the death of a spouse as well as enduring some form of physical disability, ailment or mental illness, are noted causes. When elder adults attempt suicide, they are serious about wanting to die, while in younger populations, it is often a cry for help. The authors of The Last Dance: Encountering Death and Dying, note that "For some older people suicide is seen as a rational choice that offers release from severe illness or other hardships of old age. Old age can be a period of increased life satisfaction and ego integrity, or one of dissatisfaction, despair, and disgust." The authors also note that double suicides occur with "greatest frequency among the elderly."

I find it interesting that most folks who commit suicide do not leave notes. Only about 1/4 of suicides leave a message. And, as much as we want to help, "there is little reason to be optimistic about the prospect of preventing suicide, at least in the sense of eliminating it for the repertory of human behaviors. To do so, the causes of human unhappiness and dissatisfaction would have to be eliminated. ...This is not to say that efforts to relieve human suffering are not worth pursuing, only that they are inherently limited. (440).

Learning the above facts regarding the elderly and suicide, helps us pay more attention to people who live alone, or who seem lonely; and, reinforces our belief that as human beings we sometimes need the support of others to get through a rough spot in our lives no matter our age. As the authors note, "committing suicide is a bad decision, on a bad day." We may never know how much of a blessing our visits to the elderly are, or whether we have turned a "bad day" into a good day for someone who is isolated, alone, or lonely. If we are to be of good intention, then we must visit people not to get something in return, but because it's the right thing to do. The gift of being present to another person without expectations is the greats of gifts.

Dorothy Parker once wrote a poem called Resume that the authors of The Last Dance included in their book. It goes like this:
RESUME
Razors pain you;
Rivers are damp;
Acid stains you;
And drugs cause cramp.
Guns aren't lawful;
Nooses give;
Gas smells awful;
You might as well live.

I pray that all people live for the adventure of being alive, focusing on what they can do rather than on what they can't; and, certainly not because the means of ending it all are too unsavory as Dorothy Parker would have us believe.